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OUR WAY OF LIFE: Helping divorcees pick up the pieces
FIRST PERSON: Dan Daly
Dan Daly and his wife Anne have led seven DivorceCare classes since 2004. Dan also was instrumental in building Aurora’s first Habitat for Humanity house. He has been employed by Nebraska Public Power for 31 years.
Divorce: The word brings out strong emotions and feelings despite its prevalence in today’s American society. It can be devastating to a person’s emotional, physical and spiritual well-being, as well as difficult for children and other family and friends involved.
I had seen it happen to friends, family and coworkers. But when it happens to you, it opens up a whole new perspective on the subject. This is the experience of both myself and my current wife Anne, as we each previously gone through a divorce prior to our marriage five years ago.
A woman at our church who was in need of support after her divorce encouraged us to look at the materials of a program called “DivorceCare.” After reviewing the materials, we were especially interested in helping. It is a curriculum based on Scripture and we feel that allowing God to do his work in our lives is the only true way to heal from any hurt.
Knowing that divorce doesn’t define who you are, we approached our church family at Monroe Evangelical Free (located between Phillips and Marquette in rural Hamilton County). They supported the idea and financed the purchase of materials.
So in June 2004, along with another couple from our church, Tom and Gina Aspegren, my wife Anne and I launched the first session of DivorceCare in Aurora at the Alice M. Farr Public Library. We felt it important that people from the whole area, not just our church, would feel free to join us at this neutral site.
The DivorceCare curriculum consists of 13 sessions covering a variety of topics such as loneliness, anger, forgiveness, finances and the impact on our children. This curriculum encourages those who still have a chance to salvage their marriages to work at that. It also recognizes that with our no-fault divorce laws, it takes two people to be committed to a marriage.
Each meeting features a 35-minute video of foremost experts with thousands of hours of counseling experience. This is followed by a time of discussion and, if willing, those in attendance share some of their personal challenges with the material discussed.
Participants have said that it is therapeutic to share and listen to others who have gone through the same types of situations and difficulties that they have. It is always our goal to remind those involve in this program that the object is to work on their own personal healing, not to bash their ex-spouse.
Typically, every year there have been one or two sessions of DivorceCare in the Aurora area. We have had anywhere between three to 13 people in a class.
After our divorces, Anne and I both felt there didn’t seem to be much out there as far as support and support groups. The sad part for me is that the sessions are usually made up of 90 percent women and 10 percent men, even though there are just as many divorced men out there as there are women. I think many men are missing out on true healing after their divorce.
It is important to note that neither Anne nor I are trained counselors but facilitators of this program. We encourage those who are in counseling not to discontinue with their current therapy.
The most important thing we have learned is that everyone centers their life around something, whether it’s another person, money, their job or something else. Divorce-Care has shown us that faith in Jesus Christ is the only solid thing that we can center our lives around. We felt the need to use this particular program for that very reason. Also, there is a huge redeeming reward when you can give some assistance to others who are going through the same difficult situations you have been through.
For more information on future DivorceCare classes, call the Dalys at (402) 694-5943. For more info on the DivorceCare program, go online towww.DivorceCare.com.
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Divorce: The word brings out strong emotions and feelings despite its prevalence in today’s American society. It can be devastating to a person’s emotional, physical and spiritual well-being, as well as difficult for children and other family and friends involved.
I had seen it happen to friends, family and coworkers. But when it happens to you, it opens up a whole new perspective on the subject. This is the experience of both myself and my current wife Anne, as we each previously gone through a divorce prior to our marriage five years ago.
Knowing that divorce doesn’t define who you are, we approached our church family at Monroe Evangelical Free (located between Phillips and Marquette in rural Hamilton County). They supported the idea and financed the purchase of materials.
So in June 2004, along with another couple from our church, Tom and Gina Aspegren, my wife Anne and I launched the first session of DivorceCare in Aurora at the Alice M. Farr Public Library. We felt it important that people from the whole area, not just our church, would feel free to join us at this neutral site.
The DivorceCare curriculum consists of 13 sessions covering a variety of topics such as loneliness, anger, forgiveness, finances and the impact on our children. This curriculum encourages those who still have a chance to salvage their marriages to work at that. It also recognizes that with our no-fault divorce laws, it takes two people to be committed to a marriage.
Each meeting features a 35-minute video of foremost experts with thousands of hours of counseling experience. This is followed by a time of discussion and, if willing, those in attendance share some of their personal challenges with the material discussed.
Participants have said that it is therapeutic to share and listen to others who have gone through the same types of situations and difficulties that they have. It is always our goal to remind those involve in this program that the object is to work on their own personal healing, not to bash their ex-spouse.
Typically, every year there have been one or two sessions of DivorceCare in the Aurora area. We have had anywhere between three to 13 people in a class.
After our divorces, Anne and I both felt there didn’t seem to be much out there as far as support and support groups. The sad part for me is that the sessions are usually made up of 90 percent women and 10 percent men, even though there are just as many divorced men out there as there are women. I think many men are missing out on true healing after their divorce.
It is important to note that neither Anne nor I are trained counselors but facilitators of this program. We encourage those who are in counseling not to discontinue with their current therapy.
The most important thing we have learned is that everyone centers their life around something, whether it’s another person, money, their job or something else. Divorce-Care has shown us that faith in Jesus Christ is the only solid thing that we can center our lives around. We felt the need to use this particular program for that very reason. Also, there is a huge redeeming reward when you can give some assistance to others who are going through the same difficult situations you have been through.
For more information on future DivorceCare classes, call the Dalys at (402) 694-5943. For more info on the DivorceCare program, go online towww.DivorceCare.com.
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